Your Child is an Echo of your Actions.
I am sure you will agree that, often, the biggest truths are hidden in historical texts. This is why, when in doubt, our grandparents were wise, yet humble, to go back to the ancient texts seeking answers to their everyday troubles. Sometimes, these inspections provided them with direct answers while other times, they provided pointers for further introspection and analysis.
I was surprised to have come across such a golden nugget from an ancient work called Thirukurral , a classic Tamil Sangam literature consisting of 1330 couplets and a work on ethics and study of human behavior. It was authored by Thiruvalluvar , a celebrated Tamil poet and philosopher, who is thought to have lived sometime between 1st century BC and 8th century AD.
Now to mention what I found surprisingly relevant to today, was the following excerpt on parenting. Yes, parenting – and I believe every parent, both new and experienced, has tons to learn from this. So read on, be amazed and try to implement these simple, yet effective points into your parenting and see the magic come alive…
1. If your child lies to you often, it is because you over-react too harshly to their inappropriate behavior.
2. If your child is not taught to confide in you about their mistakes, youve lost them.
3. If your child had poor self-esteem, it is because you advise them more than you encourage them.
4. If your child does not stand up for themselves, it is because from a young age you have disciplined them regularly in public.
5. If your child takes things that do not belong to them, it is because when you buy them things, you dont let them chose what they want.
6. If your child is cowardly, it is because you help them too quickly.
7. If your child does not respect other peoples feelings, it is because instead of speaking to your child, you order and command them.
8. If your child is too quick to anger, it is because you give too much attention to misbehavior and you give little attention to good behavior.
9. If your child is excessively jealous, it is because you only congratulate them when they successfully complete something and not when they improve at something even if they dont successfully complete it.
10. If your child intentionally disturbs you, it is because you are not physically affectionate enough.
11. If your child is openly defied, it is because you openly threaten to do something but dont follow through.
12. If your child is secretive, it is because they dont trust that you wont blow things out of proportion.
13. If your child talks back to you, it is because they watch you do it to others and think its normal behavior.
14. If your child doesnt listen to you but listens to others, it is because you are too quick to make decisions.
15. If your child rebels it is because they know you care more about what others think than what is right or wrong.
Founder CEO, Vidyarambh